IMH was born after a long 28-hour labor (and an even longer 6-year IVF journey) in September. As you can imagine, my husband and I had dreamed of this moment for many years. Our precious miracle was FINALLY here. We anticipated lots of time with her and dreamed of bringing her home to her nursery, to her adoring friends and family, and to meeting her big brother- our cat. Unfortunately, though, she had trouble breathing when she was born and was quickly sent to the NICU at BI.

Nine hours after giving birth, my mom drove me on a day pass into Boston to reconnect with my newborn and my husband. That first day is a blur and all I remember is seeing her on CPAP and struggling to make the connection that this was MY child. By the second day, I was eager to spend more time with her and bond. I was discharged and re-joined my husband at her bedside. While attempting skin-to-skin time I was always pulling some wire, causing her IV to occlude, or dislodging her little nasal cannula from her nose. Nurses were bustling in and out, giving her a pacifier, adjusting her position, and generally caring for her way more than I could. As my husband drove us home that day, I sobbed. "I just want to feel like her mom. Instead, I feel like the most incompetent member of her care team". I knew the nurses needed to care for her, but I just felt so left out and incapable of caring for or bonding with my precious baby.

As she weaned off CPAP and IV fluids, things did get a bit easier, but the commute into Boston just continued to drag on our spirits. When the opportunity to go back to Beverly arose, we immediately took it. The first day or two at Beverly were wonderful. If SCN hadn't already been honored with a DAISY Team Award, I would be nominating all of them. However, we met one very special nurse in those early days.

Terri took care of us starting on Saturday, and we had a lovely 4-day stretch with her. Every time we had to do something (feeding, bath, medications, changing), Terri told me, "Just treat her how you would if you were home." She not only allowed me to act like an actual, normal mother, but she taught me so much along the way. She helped us with our first bath and then let us do our second on our own, just like "normal" parents. She always let us do the changing, the feeding, and the decision-making. It felt like Terri was our support rather than our boss.

It was in those days with Terri that I really felt like I made the turn from feeling like just another person in the room to feeling like I's mom. I will never forget her generosity, her patience with my anxious questions, or her wisdom. Terri, you are a gift to SCN, and we are so fortunate you came into our lives!