G was admitted to Duke’s PCICU shortly after birth due to dilated cardiomyopathy and has spent the last few months inpatient waiting for a heart transplant, which she recently received and is now recovering from. We were not aware of any issues with her prior to birth, so this entire experience was traumatic for us as parents. Navigating a heart failure journey and hospital stay was not part of our maternity leave plans.

We quickly learned that we were in great hands in the PCICU, but I was still having an extremely hard time balancing being at the hospital and spending time at home with our three-year-old. I knew that medically she was getting great care, but what about the nurturing and attention she needs when I am not there? Is she just laying in a bed? Do the nurses have time to comfort her constantly?

I would say my bar for staff was: how well do they notice and advocate for concerns… but maybe even more so… do they have any interest in just giving her comfort?

Feilds set the bar for all of the above.

I first met him on one of my overnights with G. He was the nurse for the evening and went above and beyond what I had seen others do, and it was already a pretty high bar because the PCICU is full of amazing nurses.

He is excellent at explaining test results in a way that makes sense to us as parents, walking us through what is going on with G and what everything could mean. While he is here for G, he is also here for us as parents. I do not think he lets 10 minutes go by without making sure we have what we need and encouraging us to get some rest.

Even when he is not her nurse, he consistently comes into the room to see how we are holding up and asks if there is anything he could provide clarity on.

And then there is his focus on caring for G.

I do not know quite how to explain how Feilds is so attentive and nurturing to these babies, other than to say it is an extension of every mom here. Giving her baths, holding her while giving feeds, and even tucking her into his jacket and walking her around to keep her happy. He instinctively knows how to soothe and care for these babies, beyond the education he has received to do so.

Like I have said before, there is not a nurse in this unit that I do not trust our daughter with. They have all proven themselves time and time again, but there is just something about Fields and the way he handles care.

There is not a shift he has been on that he has not checked on G. Even this morning, after he clocked out from a busy night shift. He had not had time to come by through the night, so he did it on his way out, and of course, just as she had dirtied a diaper. He had no reason to change it, no longer on the clock, but he did it anyway, and even changed her bandages that may have gotten some on them.

That is Feilds every day,  and not just with us but with every patient. In his spare time, he helps coworkers or soothes babies.

I sleep well at home on the nights I know Feilds is here, and I mean just in the building. He may not have her for the evening, but if he is at work, I know he “has her.” If anything was wrong or if her nurse needed assistance, he would be there in a heartbeat. I will always say, “Oh, Feilds is here, I can go home now.” In a situation like this, where your child is fighting to live, I do not know a higher bar than the trust of a mother.

When I am unsure of something going on with G, I know he will be transparent in his answer. If he were concerned, then I would be too. If he told me it’s something they deal with often and can manage, I believe it. Feilds, and the nurses like him, make it hard to leave the ICU. G has spent her entire life in this unit so far, and he feels like a co-parent. It almost feels unfair that we get to take her home and watch her grow up when he and others have played such an important part in her life.

As a parent, this is one of the hardest experiences you can go through, and his ability to care for our daughter goes beyond the scope of what is required of a nurse, making it survivable for us.

I have had a lot of time to try and find the words to describe the impact of the staff here in the PCICU, and that really sums it up:

Their job is to take care of our daughter and keep her medically stable.
The part of the job they do not get enough credit for is keeping the parents stable.

I do not know how we would have survived this experience without nurses like Feilds, without the clear passion he has for what he does.