Miranda Beuerlein
May 2020
Miranda
Beuerlein
,
BSN, RNC-NIC, RN
Neonatal Intensive Care Unit
Children’s National Hospital

 

 

 

Miranda talked me down off the ledge by leading me through a breathing exercise. I asked her to pray with and for me. Without even blinking, she launched into a prayer not just for me, but for my daughter, husband, and other children.
The last time my daughter passed out and had to be resuscitated, it took more than five minutes. Although it wasn't my first time seeing her look lifeless, this particular experience shook me to my core because of how long it took to bring her back and because it was the first time I believed that she was truly gone. Miranda, however, not only brought my daughter back; she did it with a level of proficiency that gave me confidence that everything would be alright. Seeing that I had started to hyperventilate after the event, she talked me down off the ledge by leading me through a breathing exercise. I asked her to pray with and for me. Without even blinking, she launched into a prayer not just for me, but for my daughter, husband, and other children. Her presence and demeanor instantly restored calm to what had been a chaotic moment. By the time I was in a better place, it was almost 2 am. I called my husband, who immediately came to the hospital. While waiting for him, Miranda talked me through my daughter's future medical plan and patiently answered questions that I had always been afraid to ask in the past. When my husband arrived, I had to leave my daughter's room because of the COVID restrictions so that he could come up. Miranda sensed my hesitancy and offered to hold our daughter until my husband could come up. He later confided in me that he walked in on Miranda lovingly rocking our daughter who had cuddled up to her.
We have been in the NICU for over 100 days. Each day is different, but the one constant feeling has been despair at our new normal. Miranda's compassion and care on that night helped renew a sense of hope that all would be alright. I am truly grateful.