Alyssa Costa
January 2020
Alyssa
Costa
,
RN
Bone Marrow Transplant
The Hospital for Sick Children
Toronto
Canada

 

 

 

From the first day I got admitted into Sickkids, Alyssa gave me her everything. She welcomed me with open arms and a warm smile. It didn't feel like I had just been diagnosed with myelodysplastic syndrome (a type of leukemia) and needed a stem cell transplant, it felt more like entering a new friend's house. During this difficult period, she always made sure I had a smile on my face. She brought me books to read because I had once told her I was an avid reader, she would tell me hilarious stories about her dog and how old she was and when we played bingo she would always celebrate when I won.
Medically, she was also amazing. She was always quick to action if I needed anything. She listened to every worry or concern I had and never failed to answer my questions. She not only held me as an equal but also my family. She explained complex concepts in a way we could understand and had the utmost patience when my mom and dad asked questions (or when my dad asked the same question twice). If Alyssa didn't know something, she made it her mission to find out for us.
Alyssa became part of our family. When my dad and brother came to visit me in the hospital, she would talk to them. My mom stayed with me throughout my stay at SickKids, and whenever Alyssa checked on me, she also made sure my mom had everything she needed. One of my favourite things Alyssa and I did was have these long conversations about life. Here we would share our pasts, funny stories, regrets, worries, and dreams for the future. It was these conversations that made my little hospital room feel so big. It is these conversations that gave me hope to keep fighting because I had a world to explore.
Growing up I suffered from a brain tumor and I did 5 years of chemotherapy. After that experience like many, I swore I would never go through it again. 10 years later I thought everything to do with the hospital was behind me. You can understand my surprise and dismay when I got diagnosed with blood cancer. I remember feeling a lot of things, sadness, confusion, anger, etc. I had a great support system at home, but I still felt this anger towards myself as if all of this was my fault. I put on a happy face but deep down I had these feelings.
Alyssa and many of the nurses helped me deal with these feelings. They made sure I knew that it was normal to have them and encouraged me to share how I felt. Talking helped me feel better and reminded me that it was within me to get better. Having a nurse who did all these things for me made me feel that I had control over my disease. I knew what was happening, every ache and pain had a reason. I never felt like I was left in the dark. Having that kind of mindset, the sense that I was bigger than my disease helped keep my spirits up and overall, made my healing process easier.
During a time when my entire life was turned upside, Alyssa was one of those special people who brought light into my life. During a time where I wanted to cry out in pain and doing simple things like eating and walking were difficult to do, Alyssa made me laugh and appreciate the life I was fighting for. I hope everyone gets to experience the same kind of kindness and love I did during my stay. Thank you, Alyssa, for everything you did for me!